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From Highly Sensitive Hot Mess to Highly Sensitive Badass: 8 Steps to Empowerment for Highly-Sensitive People, Empaths and Intuitives.

Can you relate to fellow HSP, Emiliya? Here is her experience with reading From Hot Mess to Badass:

“I started by reading Cortney’s eBook, which I found to be extremely relevant to my life. To give some background, for the past 10 years my life was revolving entirely around my children and my family. In an effort to be a good mother, wife and daughter I had been tending to the needs of everyone around me and completely neglecting my own.

And the most disappointing part was that the more I was giving, the more people wanted me to give. It seemed like no one was appreciating me, everything I was doing was just ‘my responsibility’ and was being taken for granted and it was never enough.

As a result I was feeling extremely worn out and unhappy, I had become a grumpy person and not very pleasant to be around. In a way I felt like I had lost my own identity. I was reading books, watching movies and listened to music that my husband loved; I was spending my vacations with him at his favorite destination with his friends doing what he wanted to do.

I felt completely disconnected from myself, my interests and the jovial fun-loving person I once used to be.

So when I read the HSP eBook I felt like it was written for me to help me see the light and it “gave me permission” to think about myself as a person and to care for myself, as any thought of self-care previously would be rejected by my sense of guilt.

I kept a copy of the book at my desk at work and a copy at home and started working religiously through the 8 steps of transformation that Cortney so well identifies.

I somehow moved very quickly from acceptance of my HSP situation and preparing my mindset for self-care to working simultaneously on Step 3, 4 and 5. 
My favorite is of course Step 3 –“Implement self-care and pleasure”. I started taking Epsom salt baths 3 times a week, which helps me relax and helps with the quality of my sleep. I started listening to music of my choice all day long, including at work, and discovering new artists and songs which fill my soul with pleasure and positive energy. I gave myself permission to take more ballroom dance classes, which I had just signed up for a few months prior as a way to escape my crazy reality.

Now I no longer feel guilty for spending so much money on dance lessons and I even started going to NYC to attend dance socials, which would have been unthinkable before Cortney’s transformational influence.

Another big change I implemented is my ‘alone time’ on Saturday mornings, which I would previously spend cleaning the house like a maniac. I created a weekly routine to just sit on the sofa and read spiritual and self-development books which I absolutely love while listening to music, after my husband agreed to take the kids out to play for 2-3 hours.

I am also learning how to set boundaries and say ‘no’ to people. I started avoiding people who give me negative energy and I concentrate on those who share my spiritual believes because the deep conversations with them are so enriching to my mind and soul.

I even gave myself permission to go away for a weekend at a spiritual retreat and also attended a two –day event in NYC with the School of Womanly Arts where I had the pleasure to meet Cortney.

I am now learning to set boundaries even with my family as my own sanity has taken priority. As a result of all these changes the quality of time I spend with my children is significantly higher as they have a much happier mother who is actually able to have fun with them.

So thank you, Cortney, for the great influence and tremendous help in discovering the importance of self-care and rebuilding my lost self-identity!”

– Emiliya Tomin